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It's just an effing sheep! | May 03, 2004 12:22
Greg Proops just had to do a whole routine about Shrek didn't he? I was so embarrassed. But then I realised, no wait – he's got Dubya. That's a whole lot more embarrassment right there. But, oh god, he was right. Are we so starved for entertainment that we have devote whole live television shows to a sheep?
Shrek's cave, Shrek's view for god's sake. They stopped short at showing Shrek's poop on Holmes, but I swear I saw some when they were inspecting Shrek's food source, which was – no really – the grasses growing outside his cave.
Holmes huffed and puffed his way around the high country like a bag of lard, and then huffed and puffed his way around the television shearing shed. "What more is there to say?" he asked at one point, and I had to wonder. What indeed. It's a friggin' sheep! But Holmes, who has clearly never heard of letting the picture tell the story (and is that a simple story or what?) waffled desperately on. Apparently, his every waking moment has to be filled with speech of some kind.
Possibly the only interesting moment was when Shrek's owner revealed why he'd chosen to have Shrek shorn with the good old manual blades, rather than the vicious electric kind. He didn't want to stress the sheep too much, which I think is farmer talk for, 'it would be a really bad look if a sheep that hasn't been shorn for six years karked it of shock right there on television'. Personally, I think it would really have livened things up.
And what about all those little kids holding up signs reading "Shrek Rocks"? That is just sad. Haven't they heard of Playstation down there? Anyway, enough! Argh! It's just a friggin' sheep!
I am so busted. There I was thinking I was an ordinary mother of two living a happy life in Pt Chev doing a few blogs about the telly and then a weird guy with deformities and a cowboy hat walked into the bedroom where I was lying in a heroin-induced stupor and said, 'time to wake up little girl' and I come around to find I am Damian Christie! Bring on the dwarves …
Which is a nice segue into this email from Ant Timpson:
I can't believe you haven't devoted any pixels to the most rancid piece of reality TV ever to come slurping down the pike.
Paradise Hotel is, bar none, the most compulsively watchable, slickly packaged and masterful edited, hunk of excrement ever to grace the ugly glowbox.
Watch in awe at the insipid, shallow, vain, petty monster -- and that's just the host! It's also the only show that confuses its audience into thinking they're losing their minds, what with Prime and Sky 1 both showing the show slightly out of sequence, you never know what you're watching isn't future history past. And don't even try to follow the show's logic. They changed the format halfway through due to budgetary cuts! They're making it up as it goes along. I'm serious! It's quite incredible.
All this plus my fave show coming soon -- The Littlest Bachelor. Yes you heard right. The Bachelor with midgets and dwarves. And then in the surprise twist ala Average Joe they bring in the full height people. Can you wait?
Also one local women's rag already spoiled the end of the new Trump show. Doesn't anyone subedit those turdrags? They've spoiled Survivor in the past but never have they ruined a show that hasn't even started screening.
I actually did have a look at Paradise Hotel on your recommendation Ant, but about 20 seconds in I had a brain aneurysm and fell into a coma. When I come round (again), I found I had the intellectual capacity of Paris Hilton. Damian Christie is actually writing this blog.
Which segues into this link from Chris, about the reality spin 20/20 in the US put on an item where couples were vying, on camera, to adopt a baby. Weirdly, spoon bender Uri Geller is threatening legal action, claiming the idea comes from his unpublished novel. Even more weirdly, Geller has the patent on the idea.
James writes that he'd like to take credit for the MTV Blag show mentioned in the last post in connection with Brent Hansen:
I sat next to Brent at last year's bnet NZ music awards for the entire evening, and having discussed various other topics (mostly our mutual upbringings in Chch), eventually came to the topic of my presence: "So how are you involved in all of this [the bnet awards]?" he asked. "I'm not," I replied honestly, "I blagged my way in -- I'm actually just the librarian at the Metservice." Oh how he laughed! I wonder if I can get a look-in on the profits?
Paul writes that he just doesn't get Nip/Tuck:
I watched the first couple but there isn't anyone that I empathise with or anyone I could give a rat's arse about (to put it bluntly). Not the kids, not the patients, not the doctors, not the girlfriends ... what's the point? Now, Buffy, that's a different matter. Have just ordered Season 2 on DVD from Aus cos it's on sale. Mmmmm Willow.
And that James Griffin had promised that "Big Hairy Balls", the Serial Killers ep on Friday was good:
… and by the gods he was right! More like that. Yes. Got it in one. Excellent comedy – wouldn't have been out of place in a series like Frontline I would suggest. Boffo, a good one.
Lastly, I've just seen the first ep of The Insiders Guide to Happiness, which starts May 20, and I can report good things. It's a sort of weddings-funerals-anything crossed with Chaos Theory, Karma and Wellington. The ep was a bit more serious than I thought it would be and it has a challenging criss-cross of characters, events and even timelines, but hell, we've seen Pulp Fiction and Memento. Heck, even episodes of ER have been told backwards. We can cope.
The Secret Life of The Datsuns | Apr 29, 2004 16:08
Former Straitjacket Fits and Bike singer/songwriter Andrew Brough revealed in the Flying Nun documentary last year that he made a bit of dosh these days from having his music played on Aussie soaps. "Down in Splendour" gets played on Neighbours and -- wey-hey! -- he gets to eat.
The cheque's in the mail then for Salmonella Dub and a few others, thanks to The Secret Life of Us, which regularly uses New Zealand music: two Salmonella songs on Tuesday and The Datsuns' "Sittin' Pretty".
Does it matter though that "Sittin' Pretty" featured in a scene where one of the characters was listening on his headphones while making squelchy noises with his trouser snake? What are we to make of this? The Aussies think The Datsuns are wank-worthy? Or is it some not-so-subtle comment on the people who listen to NZ music? Still, I'm sure The Datsuns aren't too proud to pick up the cheque.
Excellent Secret Life of Us on Tuesday btw; they've mastered the trick of portraying issues on a conversational and non-proselytising level (in fact you hardly know they're issues) AND they get to take Es and go dancing. Is it the only show in Australia that features an Aboriginal character (played by the lovely Deborah Mailman) who isn't a farm hand or travelling around the outback? Might be.
The plastic surgery on telly phenomenon continues, in Britain, Channel 5 is planning a plastic surgery show that features "live" operations, with surgeons giving "director's commentaries". Here's a Guardian story.
The logical progression would be MTV's I Want a Famous Face, where punters get surgery to look like a celeb. Actor-comedian Doug Benson (I don't know who he is either, but he does quite funny movie reviews at this website) is quoted in Entertainment Weekly: "After the surgery, you look in the mirror and you go, 'Wow. I've got Brad Pitt's face … if he was ugly.'"
Meanwhile, MTV is also going to produce more global format shows, including one narrated by 80-year-old English actor Leslie Phillips called Blag, where unknowns attempt to gatecrash celebrity parties. The new shows are an initiative by … ta-da … Kiwi Brent Hansen, who is now MTV's International Head of Creative. Dude!
Meanwhile, James Griffin – yes, that James Griffin -- writes that he'd like to apologise to Rose, from the previous post, for depressing her with the series he wrote called Serial Killers:
In fact, Rose's critique has fired up something in my last few functioning synapses and has provoked me into thinking about something that both intrigues and saddens me (even more than her hurtful words). And that thing is ...
The way Rose can go, with such ease, from saying she doesn't like Serial Killers to saying "it's lamentable that we as Kiwis have such a natural feel for the irreverent, subversive, risk-takingly humorous, and yet rarely does that translate into good television comedy." One show becomes the scapegoat for the failure of an entire industry to find the Kiwi funny-bone and whack it until the tears roll down our cheeks.
What's sad about this, obviously, is that it's bloody well true. We make so little television comedy that every time one comes along, if someone doesn't like it, it becomes an indictment on us all -- and journalists up and down the country drag out their old 'why aren't we funny?' articles, change a few names and wheel it out again … what I'm really saying here is that wouldn't it be lovely if Rose could say she didn't like Serial Killers, with it's "half-baked, cringe-worthy stereotypes" and its "poor imitation of the jittery camera work" (which is much more Frontline than The Office, by the way), then compare it to the two or three other cracking New Zealand comedies which are more irreverent and subversive and risk-takingly humorous which she did like? Wouldn't that be wonderful? Wouldn't that be the sign of a truly grown up television industry in this country?
But until that glorious day, when the networks of this land bestow money upon the comedy makers like mana from heaven and we can make all these great series, until then Rose, you'll have to make do with the occasional little honest attempt that comes along, trying to put a smile on your dial. It's the best we can do, really.
James also says that, in his humble opinion, tomorrow (Friday's) episode, "Big Hairy Balls" is really good.
God, he's right, we just don't make enough of anything, especially at the moment. But wait, isn't that – it can't be. It is! A new local drama series! Omigod! Folks, I'm going to see an advance screening of The Insiders Guide to Happiness, the new series from The Gibson Group, who brought you The Strip, on Monday (3rd). Will keep you posted.
Chicago Sun Times critic Phil Rosenthal writes about the voting in the US for American Idol, which points out that they don't reveal how many are cast over there either. Contains spoilers re who has been voted off, if you care.
The Letterman list is quite boring, except:
Friday (30th): Julianne Moore and Todd Rundgren
Tuesday (4th): Hillary Rodham Clinton and The Roots
Wednesday (5th): Musical guests Loretta Lynn and Jack White (Hope they do "Portland Oregon", which starts: "Well, Portland Oregon and slow gin fizz, if that ain't love then I don't know what is … uh huh.")
Lastly, I had a laugh at this story and graph, written by a couple from Television Without Pity, about The Curse of the Ziering. Sadly, David Boreanaz made the cut, although I have a suspicion it might be true. Hush my mouth!
Mortality play | Apr 26, 2004 11:17
Did you see Nip/Tuck come over all Six Feet Under last week? Just when I thought N/T was merely a series of comeuppances for dastardly Dr Christian, a corpse's head started talking to Sean.
The whole scene had that Space Odyssey nothingness about it: an almost empty white room, a neat row of corpses' heads on trolleys, a neat row of surgeons breaking the coprses' noses in unison. No wonder Sean started hallucinating.
But Nip/Tuck's a funny programme. After the initial sex-death-disposing of the body in the Florida swamp opening, it's settled down to become a series of moral dilemmas for the characters and those aforementioned small comeuppances for Christian, who never learns from being tied to the bed for a couple of days by his mad ex-girlfriend, or whatever else.
He's never going to be right until he gets the woman of his dreams, Julia, although why he wants that tearful, nasal hysteric is a mystery. You'd think she would have stopped crying by now.
There's only three episodes left in the current season; reportedly, Famke Janssen (Jean Grey in X-Men) will play Julia's life coach in season two, and Vanessa Redgrave will play her mother. The show has been looking for a woman in her early 40s-50s with a good bod to be a nude double for her. Guess it's impossible to go on Nip/Tuck without getting your gear off.
Flea comments:
Has anyone else commented on how great Maori TV is? We are really enjoying it as an alternative -- we have been turning to it randomly when there is nothing else to watch on the other channels -- which is quite often -- and are always pleasantly surprised but what we see!
Yes! Peter McLennan loves DIY Marae:
It's genius. Same theme as DIY Rescue, but with cultural values added. Some landscaping, gardening, painting, but also getting the kids to clean and repaint the carvings and panels. At the start of the show, they send the old kuia off while they do up the marae. Then they come back at the end, visibly moved, crying ... its amazing. One old fella talked about doing in four days what they'd been trying to do for the last 30 years. He said Some of the koro and kuia who are no longer with us would've loved to see this -- you can almost hear them, not turning in their graves, but dancing in them!
It was so choice. Catch it if you can. Its taking an incredibly played out TV idea and giving it new meaning, hell, giving it some meaning beyond vacuous entertainment. Tu meke!
Meanwhile, Rose couldn't understand why I liked Serial Killers:
Oh Fiona, what on God's green earth could possibly move you to surmise that "Serial Killers was great ..."? I watched it with, admittedly, fairly high expectations (why, oh why was it billed as the new The Office? The comparison was cruelly misleading -- the only similarity being a poor imitation of the jittery camera work. I thought the characters were half-baked, cringe-worthy stereotypes and the comedy was seriously lacking. In fact about half way through I started to wonder if it was really intended to be comedy at all, it was just so safe and conventional and flat. I don't blame the actors for this, I thought Robyn Malcolm was good and I love Oliver Driver and John Leigh. I'm sure that given the right script they would have the capacity to be funny, and in fact I reckon both Driver and Leigh had better comic moments in their roles on Shortland Street than they did in the first episode of Serial Killers.
The whole situation depresses me. I just think it's lamentable that we as kiwis have such a natural feel for the irreverent, subversive, risk-takingly humorous, and yet very rarely does that translate into good television comedy.
What can I say? I laughed, which is generally an indication that I'm amused, although the second episode on Friday wasn't quite as good as the first – except for the excellent exchange between Oliver Driver's character and Sara Wiseman's annoying hippie: "You're so angry …"
"I am now."
In other news, this link takes you to the Two and a Half Men website, where the video tour "Angus T Jones (Jake) gives a tour of the set!" features our own Melanie Lynskey, who plays Rose on the show. Entertainment Weekly thought she "makes mild insanity adorable" in its recent appraisal of the sitcom, giving it a B-, pretty high praise in the current US sitcom wasteland.
Check out the new website for TVNZ, which was officially launched last week. Shamefully, there is no separate info for Serial Killers. Also, this NZ TV website, which covers the local TV sites -- although not Idol blog.
Quotes:
"You know why iron's like a woman don't you? The hotter you get her, the easier she is to handle." – A blacksmith on a One News item.
"It was an outside job." – Gil Grissom, referring to a bee that killed a guy. Even Sara smiled at that one.
Further to what we were saying about the relevance, or not, of David Beckham's private life, TV2 is screening Rebecca Loos -- My Story tomorrow night (Tues 27th) at 9.35pm (replaces Alias), followed by The Real Beckhams at 10.35pm. The press release can barely contain itself: "Catch Rebecca Loos when she reveals all the sordid details of her alleged affair with David Beckham -- from steamy hotel room romps -- to the details of those infamous sex texts."
Lastly, we're getting The Apprentice, guys, the one with Donald Trump. Lucky us.
Glory in Babble-on | Apr 18, 2004 15:42
Many thoughtful and considered emails have flooded into Radiation since its inception. Okay - more like a babbling brook, but we love them all in their own special way.
I've already excerpted many in blogs, but it's time to see some in their full, raw, unexpurgated, Rachel-Hunter-naked-in-Playboy and with only minor grammatical corrections glory.
C'mon down Nic Igusa,
What is up with Holmes? I thought it was supposed to be a show about NZers, not some vapid celebrity-worshipping twaddle. I'm not normally in front of the TV at 7pm, but happened to put on Holmes last night to be bombarded with Susan Wood alternating between tripping up on her words and gushing breathlessly about Beckham's biography. I mean, in a country where we see more of Beckham on the Vodafone ads that on a football field, why must the lead segment (all 10 minutes of it) be taken up with an English professor humming and hahing about the whole 'he said she said' affair debacle? Who cares?? Is that really the NZ angle that Holmes' producer is always looking for?
I had to turn the TV off when we got to the human interest story. A barely coherent child talking about some adventure that the family's golden retriever played a part in. Hard to distinguish what the story was between giggles and childish muttering.
I was going to watch The Simpsons instead but couldn't stomach all the ads in between ...
That was my rant, this morning!
I was thinking the same thing the other night when both channels screened lengthy news pieces about the marital infidelities, or not, of a football player on the other side of the world. Just how is this relevant again? I suspect it's more to do with the amount of footage the networks get from Britain than with relative news value.
The violence on TV survey had y'all going. Kyle Matthews writes:
A few years ago -- quite a few even -- I did some research work for the NZ police into violence in the Wellington region. The police were looking for an answer that said 'less alcohol, bars closing earlier, less licenses' etc.
One of the questions that I found myself looking at as I did the research was what made people violent. Specifically, why do thousands of people go out and get drunk regularly, and not end up in a violent situation, and why do some people, when drunk, commonly end up either assaulted or assaulting. Clearly there's nothing inherent to alcohol which causes violence, or everyone that drunk would be violent. I found it difficult to provide the answer that the police wanted, even though most violence is committed under the influence of alcohol.
However we also know that our society can make proven links between those people abused when they were young becoming abusers when they are adults.
One of your writers said that they had watched many violent cartoons as a child and they weren't violent. That's great. And indeed, maybe there is no link between seeing violence as a child and being violent -- either as a child, or later in life.
However we don't make laws for non-violent, caring, sharing people who would never hurt another person. If we only made laws for those people there wouldn't be laws against rape and murder and those sorts of things. Laws are made for the small proportion of society that do anti-social behaviour.
Maybe there isn't a link between violent TV (or music, a la Marilyn Manson) and violent behaviour. If there is a link however, which we can prove, then I don't think the argument that 'I went through that situation and I am fine' is valid, even if it's for 90 per cent of people. We make laws for the other 10 per cent, and if we can change our society, particularly the way we raise children to make those 10 per cent turn out better as adults, then that's something that surely we should look at?
In the paraphrased words of a famous equestrian, it's a curly one. Can we argue for censorship when a small portion of society who may have been affected by a whole range of events and/or abuses is violent? If there was no violence on TV would there be no societal violence? Should the warnings before violent shows be extended to read "we advise discretion especially if you were abused as a child or are living with violence on a day-to-day basis"?
The lovely Andrew writes,
As a 32-year-old news and current affairs glutton I found Flipside to be a great source of topical info delivered intelligently, irreverently and, I suspect, most importantly for the demographic I assume they were pursuing, honestly.
Comparing the fantastic on-screen presence of Evie and Mike with the bumbling goons on the patronisingly vapid Headliners, and the duo on One's other late bulletin, makes one wonder why the Flipside team are being shafted. Too successful? I hardly think that their audience is going to return to the lonely Judy Bailey.
Flipside was a valuable source of news, social issues and artistic goings on (bands, theatre and so forth) that is simply not present on our Charter broadcaster. They were even scheduling some one-off docos I believe, made, God forbid, for people who have no desire to watch some of the tepid DNZ ones.
Re the burying of Serial Killers, for goodness sake, 9.45 Friday night?! Who on earth will see it then? Yet another example of the "whoever they ares" failing to support local initiatives. Shame on them. Still comedy is the bugbear for The Network, due I suspect to them insisting on inserting their clumsy little fingers into the comedy making pie. When their fingers curdle said pie they then have the audacity to blame the pie maker.
Great example of this was the fascinating doco about the BBC's El Dorado on Trouble at the Top, more quality programming (judging from the one ep I happened upon) buried late at night. No problems with that so much as the fact that they could damn well promo stuff so we know it is on. Oh sorry, that would be too easy.
Serial Killers was great too. Made me laugh – especially the journo who had written a bad review of the soap in the morning and was asking for a job in the afternoon. Hee hee. I'm sure that's happened, hasn't it? Shortland Street secret squirrels: we await your call. Remember, Flipside isn't dead yet, you just have to be home at 5pm to see it.
Okay, enough of you, back to me. In the Buffy/Angel fanverse (the rest of you can go away now if you want to), here's a story from Ain't It Cool News about Alyson Hannigan's new sitcom, Americana. The actor formerly known as Willow was also performing on stage in When Harry Met Sally, along with Luke Perry, on the West End. Here's a Guardian interview.
For us Angel fans, the dream is over (although we've got the rest of season four and all of season five to go here). Angel's been cancelled in the US, despite an incredible fan campaign and website. Buffy/Angel creator Joss Whedon is developing a feature film based on Firefly, his short-lived space Western series. Reportedly, Whedon would like David Boreanaz to appear in the film (wow, Angel in space!).
It's not all bad though. If you ever wanted a nearly life-sized Spike of your very own, and let's face it, who wouldn't, here's a downloadable 32-page poster to print out (in Adobe Acrobat) and assemble.
A booty-shaking Beyonce of our own | Apr 14, 2004 10:18
It's Camillia all the way, don't you think? She's the one you're waiting to see, she's the one you can imagine standing on stage at the end, perhaps with her arm over Michael's shoulders, and she's the one that Paul Ellis could make a record with.
She's also the one who really looks like she could hold an audience for a whole performance ("Purple Rain"!!). I think we're ready for our own booty-shaking Beyonce, she should get her own version of the "Uh-oh" dance now.
There's a lot of singing, crying and padding out the hour before then though. As the NZ Idol numbers get trimmer, so the "backview" items, or whatever they're called, get fatter. It's hard not to see the Idol factory as a spin-off training ground for prospective new TV presenters – Jesse looked quite good.
Yes, I've surrendered to the Idol experience. Bring it on. Awesome. My family keeps me humble and strong, etc. I had been in two minds up to now -- on the one hand, all the gains that have been made in New Zealand music have been by original artists, unique to us, performing their own songs. You can thank NZ On Air's Kiwi Hit Discs as well, and the involuntary radio quota, for getting programme directors at radio stations who were too stupid or lazy to find local music for themselves onto the bandwagon. NZ On Air brought the music to them on a platter, you might say. The discs are now up to number 64, plus they've had to split them up into Indie Hit Discs, Iwi Hit Discs and A/C Hit Discs – that's Adult Contemporary -- such is the breadth of music now being made in Aotearoa.
On the other hand -- what the hell? If our music industry is buoyant enough to sustain an Idol artist, and if there's money to be made here and overseas, why not? The winner, Camillia that is, will still have to work her booty off and be that person. It's not a free ride, as you might remember if you saw John Safran's Music Jamboree last year.
One song we'd like to see on Sunday: Big Dave singing The Stylistics' "Betcha By Golly Wow". Someone should have done "Sometimes When We Touch" for the ballad show too. It's not too late.
Chris McKay wrote to say that he and his wife are enjoying widescreen episodes of Alias on DVD via Amazon.com because they were sick of TV3 dicking around with it, and:
The episode you referred to the other day has a voiceover from the cast. All very amusing, but the interesting thing is that the show was broadcast in the US just after the SuperBowl at 11pm and JJ Abrams quite merrily chats about the opening shot being 'fortunate' to have Jennifer Garner in her underwear so as to grab drunk sports fans' attention before they switched channels or fell asleep.
Ah well, quelle surprise and all that. US online reviewer Catharine Tunnacliffe at Eye Weekly has referred to Jack and Sydney Bristow as "TV's most intriguing couple". It seems it's getting a bit weird there in the third season. That's not a link to the story, as it contains a massive spoiler which you may not want to know. (I've also just seen the March 13 issue of New Idea at the doctor's and it totally gives away the cliffhanger for season two. I guess that's the trouble with being an Aussie mag publishing in a NZ market.)
The story can be reached via TV Tattle if you must, which also carries a story about Quentin Tarantino being US Idol's latest guest judge. No word about whether contestants will be wearing yellow tracksuits and carrying swords to curry favour, although "Kung Fu Fighting" might be a popular song choice.
Sally recommends popcultablog, "A new blog from Dave Pell, the guy behind davenetics, nextdraft and the (now essential for me) electablog." Man, that guy is funny. And concise too. Ahem.
Matt Heath and Chris Stapp, who you may remember from such programmes as Back of the Y are now doing Thursday Drive on bFM. In between the Deja Voodoo songs and the relentless self promotion, they've had plenty to say about television violence -- get violence off the streets and back on television where it belongs seems to be the gist of it -- and some thoroughly scurrilous things to say about Sue Kedgely too. They should thank her, really, for providing them with so many jokes, and I'm sure all the "What a Pig" kids who ate a cup of fat and four day's worth of sugar over the weekend would like to thank her too.
Jake Pollock writes that he watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a child,
and was probably involved in a bit of ninja kicking and nunchuk action thereafter. I also watched Voltron, Super Ted and the Gummi Bears (all of which are rather disturbing and violent in their own right). I am now, I like to think, a well-adjusted and thoroughly non-violent individual. I remember the cartoons of my youth with fondness, but they don't inform my day-to-day actions -- at least, not in any way that I'm aware of.
I asked, but TV One can't say when they'll be starting Six Feet Under again.
Lastly, here's something to make your day. Sky has just announced it has started filming its first local reality series. The Player features 10 guys holed up in an apartment who are assigned certain tasks to test their sex appeal and general ability to be a playa, y'all. It will be fronted by (who else?) Nicky Watson. Produced by (who else?) Touchdown. Something to look forward to in May.
Suffer the little programmes | Apr 08, 2004 09:45
Does TVNZ even like its own local programmes? Unless they're cash cows like DIY Rescue or The Zoo, it seems some shows are only there under sufferance. Mercy Peak? Sorry, we've cancelled your show and we're not going to bother with any advertising for your last 10 eps and, oh, by the way, here's a reasonably crappy time slot.
The latest casualty is Flipside, the so-called youth news show that's been steadily building its audience at 6pm, and doing rather a good job of covering the issues. When a One News reporter completely failed to explain what Low Power FM broadcast licences are all about, Flipside interviewed Andrew Dubber about them.
Flipside is to lose its 10.30pm show, Flipside Late, and its 6pm show is being moved to 5pm from Monday the 12th. Rumour has it that it will be replaced altogether, just as it has become established and recognised by the audience. Presumably, it's a victim of its own success – taking viewers from TV One, maybe, both from the 6 o'clock news and the relentlessly unhip Tonight.
Another local show that's getting a rough time slot is the new comedy Serial Killers, which will go to air at 9.45pm on Friday nights (starts on the 16th). It's written by James Griffin, based on his play about behind-the-scenes of a soap opera (he's a former Shortland Streeter). It works well in the TV format, I hear, with a slight Office vibe.
Are we believing Ian Fraser when he said that "the Charter encourages us to invest in talent and imagination, to take creative risks and to provide a more diverse menu, particularly in prime time"? Not yet.
Regarding the violence on television survey, Andrew comments:
Once again we have hysteria about children's cartoons. How many of the adult commentators actually watch these? As a parent I try to know what my kids are watching. Sometimes I really enjoy the programme (Spongebob), some I tolerate, and some I discourage. But my decisions are based on time with the kids and participating in what they are doing/watching myself, not because a committee has watched TV for me and the kids. It is not surprising that violent kids TV is bad when associated with "negative clusters". But is it the TV or lack of attention to the kids?
If we have kids we must take responsibility for them, guide them etc, and not just trust that TV and teachers will raise them for us.
Quite right. Andrew, you are clearly, like me, the perfect parent. Here's that hysteria you were talking about from the Herald and Sue Kedgley.
This also from Stephen Walker:
I just thought it is was worth noting that children under three years cannot differentiate between fantasy and reality. And since a lot of people seem to use children's videos as well as TV as their default babysitter, prolonged exposure to this stuff (which may be totally innocuous for older kids) for very young children may not be a good idea, and could have long-term effects.
Yes, and aren't we all feeling really guilty after the story that too much TV for children under two interferes with brain development? Eek. I don't remember my kids watching that much telly back then. Too busy sleeping and pooping, that sort of thing. But isn't it freaky that your 2 or 3-year-old thinks that two very large bananas wearing blue-and-white-striped pyjamas could walk around the corner at any moment?
Another point: I do think the networks have to be more circumspect when advertising their murder-as-entertainment shows. A promo for SVU (do they drive SUVs?) played during the news a couple of nights ago. It was a dead guy this time, but it's usually murdered women, with the voiceover guy excitedly purring "Murder …." I'm a muter, but even the visuals are nasty.
The Letterman list is in:
Monday 12: Viggo Mortenson and Sting
Tuesday 13: Sara Jessica Parker and Nelly Furtado
Wednesday 14: Billy Crystal and Yankee Alex Rodriguez
Thursday 15: Chris Rock
Friday 16: Senator John McCain and Damien
Lastly, from our Programmes We'd Like to See Here file: MTV's Pimp My Ride, presented by rapper Xzibit, where dowdy, uncool cars get the ultimate pimp makeover! The site also has a game, The Ride Pimper, that's a fun five minutes' worth.
Hey, have a gorgeous and relaxing Easter you guys.
This just in: Rugrats is corrupting our children | Apr 05, 2004 09:55
Incredibly, the recent study into television violence found that nine of the top 10 shows featuring the highest incidence of violence were cartoons. Who would have thought? One of them is Rugrats, another is Classic Cartoon, which features the stretch-and-squeeze exploits of Mickey, Donald, Goofy and Pluto. That means that children have been exposed to a high level of violence on TV for around 50 years.
You'd think that 50 years was long enough then to measure the effects of television violence, but the 285-page study, which is downloadable via the Herald site (it's in Adobe Acrobat), points out that after something like 4000 studies into television violence over the past 50 years, no-one can actually agree on the potency and seriousness of television's influence.
The report says:
While television is but one factor in children's lives and development, there does seem to be some connection between children who have had a violence-saturated media diet and aggression in later life. In addition, television is more likely to have a negative impact on children who grow up with a cluster of negative influences such as poverty, domestic violence, truancy, etc. The 'replacement effect' of television may also be detrimental to children.
The top 10 TV shows featuring the most graphic violence (as opposed to violent incidences) were nearly all AO programmes – except for another cartoon, Pokemon. It's interesting to note that Pokemon is one of the kids' shows that the Parents Television Council of America has actually endorsed. This website features a mom who outlines all the reasons she thinks the wildly complex Pokemon is good for kids.
Okay. So I don't think children should see lots of violence on TV. I certainly don't think they should be watching CSI, SVU, Nip/Tuck or 24. That's why they're on after 8.30pm. I don't think kids should be playing excessively violent video games or watching Seven. Not until they're … not children. But I have a problem with blaming cartoons.
Cartoons exist in an entirely fantastic world, where things happen that children know are outside the realms of possibility. (Btw, novelist and mythographer Marina Warner said something similar in her interview with Kim Hill on Saturday. She's giving a lecture at the university tomorrow night.) In the current Japanimation shows that dominate kids' afternoon telly – like Yu–gi-oh! and Megaman, or Digimon on Saturday, bizarre digital beings battle each other in duels that may or may not have real consequences for their owners. The shows are extremely moral, with a heavy emphasis on being true to yourself and trusting your friends. In Yu-gi-oh!, aside from being true to your friends and supporting them, it's trusting in "the heart of the cards", another way of saying trust your choices and your learning. Cheaters never prosper, bad guys always lose.
In Megaman, three kids rush about a futuristic Japanese city battling virus attacks that the authorities are apparently powerless to resist. One is the daughter of a rich mayor who shares her wealth. They are good citizens. Even good old Spongebob Squarepants is the most pure and trusting soul in all of Bikini Bottom.
In my experience, that "cluster of negative influences" the report mentions is probably the key aspect. The most violent, or saddest, child in the school is the one most likely to see, and be on the receiving end of, violence at home. Boys might fantasy play that their toys are battling with all manner of weapons, Action Man might kill Dr X over and over with his new turbo surfboard with firing torpedo action, but that doesn't necessarily lead to violence and aggression in real life.
Sue Kedgley's comment that "It appears that some of the cartoons our children are watching are little more than animated thuggery" is bizarrely ignorant. It appears? Doesn't she know? She is the Greens spokesperson for broadcasting.
Phew. In other news, TVNZ in good idea shock: Chris Knox is introducing a series of classic noir movies every Friday night around 11.15pm. Murder My Sweet screened on Friday, others in the series are: Out of the Past (Jacques Tourneur, 1947, starring Robert Mitchum, Jane Greer and Kirk Douglas), Journey into Fear (Norman Foster, 1942, starring Joseph Cotton, Dolores del Rio and Agnes Moorhead), Deadline at Dawn (Harold Clurman, 1946, starring Susan Hayward and Paul Lukas), Born to Kill (Robert Wise, 1947, starring Claire Trevor, Lawrence Tierney), The Big Steal (Don Siegel, 1949, starring Robert Mitchum and Jane Greer) and Berlin Express (Jaques Tourneur, 1948, starring Merle Oberon and Robert Ryan).
Although keep it quiet won't you, or else TVNZ might realise they've done something good and immediately take it off.
Kick-ass action chicks in their underwear | Apr 01, 2004 10:22
Sometimes I think Alias only exists to show Jennifer Garner in her underwear. Or a bikini – did you see that on Tuesday? The panning shots, the slo-mo. If the acting thing doesn't work out for her, there's a great career awaiting at Victoria's Secret or Sports Illustrated.
Ah well, in these post-Buffy times we have to get our thrills somewhere and Alias has the Buffy metaphor thing going: stuck in a life she desperately wants out of, an unattainable boyfriend (that is until she, er, attained him this week), distant father, the fate of the world at stake. And the yearning, always with the yearning.
Bennie disagrees however:
How come we get endless episodes of Alias with a bored looking actress walking around and getting beaten up all the time, yet Dark Angel, simply the best action-chick-beats-up-guys show since Buffy gets two series left with a huge cliffhanger and then relegated to Sky? I don't dislike my parents or anything, but seeing them every week just to watch Sky is getting on my tits.
Actually, I thought Dark Angel was a typical James Cameron load of old bollocks, but to each his own kick-ass action chick. You could check out which episode you're up to at this guide at tvtome.com, Bennie.
I usually get the guest list for Letterman each week from Prime, tonight it's Matthew Perry and Lou Reed. Tomorrow (Friday), Johnny Knoxville and The Walkmen, Monday (5th) The Rock and Liz Phair, Tuesday and Wednesday are TBA, Thursday (8th) is Bruce Willis and a wolf rescue lady, and Friday (9th) is comedian Jimmy Fallon and Britney Spears. Prime also says that we're two days behind, so if you go to the website, you can work it out. Unfortunately, we missed Janet Jackson last night.
Kris Lane would prefer to see The Daily Show, however:
Something that we never see over here in New Zealand but I'm sure it would be much better than David Letterman's fawning on Prime would be The Daily Show.
I like the internet combined with TiVo with one women's BLOG on media gets us a whole heap of topical QuickTime clips to crack up over -- www.onlisareinsradar.com.
Supported in part by Archive.org, who provide bandwidth and have the mean task of archiving the internet and moving image (they have George Romero's Dawn of the Dead available for download).
It's a great use of the internet that is freely available (not a great thing for my Jetstream bill though).
But on the case of TiVo, I want one that could work without straining my frontal lobe to get it to work with the NZ infrastructure.
Some bloke called Russell Brown wrote about TiVo in his Listener column recently. We've been loaned one, but can't get it to see our Sky decoder. Plus, its proximity to the TV screen caused that "gaussing" effect or whatever it's called, when a magnet gets too close to the screen. Besides, have you seen the weekend papers? Chock-full of ads for PVRs which all have timeslip capability. It won't be long before they're selling them at the supermarket.
Lastly, both networks are rescreening interviews with Michael King. TV One's is the Kim Hill interview on Friday at 10.15pm, TV3 screens the John Campbell Home Truths interview on Sunday 10.30pm.
Jumpin' Jack Flashback | Mar 28, 2004 12:05
Salon.com's Heather Havrilesky recently held a Fix 24 contest; the top six entries included the gem: "Two words: musical episode." Sadly, Jack's unlikely to break out into song ("Regrets, I've had a few ..."), he's wrecked his voice with all that heroin and shouting for a start, but you get the point: maybe the "real-time" concept was never meant to go to three seasons.
My pick for a fix would be a flashback to Jack's time with the Salazar Gang - you know, getting his tattoo, getting high, slickly killing Ramon and Hector's enemies and having sex with Mexican hos for his country. Looks like I might get my wish too, after Thursday's double-double cross. He's already given the clearly expendable Pedro the scissor legs of death, the partying can't be too far away.
Jack's an anti-hero, but I'm not sure my sympathies lie with him anymore. 24 often seems to be an exercise in getting Jack into the most inextricable positions possible, then finding novel ways to extricate him. They also seem to think they needed a Sherry substitute, but I'm not buying the President's brother, either, even if it is DB Woodside, the spunky principal from the last season of Buffy. They don't even look alike.
But sometimes you have to sit back and feel the width: that's about a million bucks on screen right there, folks, in unmarked US banknotes, including some for Kiwi DOP Rodney Charters.
And now let's open the mail bag. John Watson comments that,
The BBC has regular roundtable discussions between media correspondents on topical local and international affairs. We need more open discussion -- not the pre-recorded sanitised variety we are getting.
That we do, although who's going to run the thing? I happened to catch a bit of Marae one morning and guess what? They were having not so much a round table discussion as a round couch one about Brash's speech/race relations etc that was enlightening. The only programme to actually get all parties together. Incredible. That would be Marae, on Sunday morning. At 11am.
And a big squishy welcome to Vibeke, who is a mum who liked Sesame Street. A lot. (Motherhood will do that to you. The technical term is "Mummybrain".) Unfortunately it's been replaced:
Options now seem stupid pink and lime green party animals, whose sole purpose in life is to say party party party, a mouse that likes ballet, hardly very punchy either, or High Five or the Wiggles and YES I KNOW THE KIDS LIKE IT, the kids like just about anything that moves ... but High Five is blond girlies in short tops looking sexy and the boys are showing off their fashionable jeans and they all pout and purr and I know that young people look nice, but why would you have to be under 22, and look like a tvdatingshowhost to be a child entertainer? And the Wiggles, well they are a bit wooden. And then Blue's Clues, DO YOU REALLY NEED TO SPELL EVERYTHING OUT LIKE THAT?
How about children's TV that is funny, and a little twisted and down to earth and has real people in it and represents the diversity or our society and is not about clothes or things you want to own or have to get, and is imaginative and not preachy and not overly goody-good educational but simply good TV, good story telling, good variety, and a little bit wacky?
Gosh I'm lucky I missed the era of High Five and my kids never liked the Christian fervour of the Wiggles. It was all Thomas the Tank Engine in my day. You wait, Vibeke - the hell of Yu-gi-oh! and the excruciating Dragonball Z may yet come. If you think High Five is bad, try sitting through the Pokemon movie. Twice. Current fave in our house: Megaman.
Some websites we like:
Square Eyes recommends www.tvshowsondvd.com and the Six Feet Under site is kick-ass, according to Magz. Yeah, those HBO sites are really good - check out The Sopranos. You just have to be careful of spoilers, as The Sopranos has just started in the US. I don't think it's a spoiler to say that Steve Buscemi is in it this season. Yay! TV One will be playing the fourth season of Six Feet Under (a few of you are hanging out!). I'll see if they can give me an approximate on when.
I've also had an email from Robyn at idolblog.com, which is a fantastic site. I've been thinking about NZ Idol, so will address that in the near future.
Game freakin' on | Mar 26, 2004 11:05
Big, warm, squishy thank yous to everyone who emailed, there are far too many for just one post. We have lots to talk about. Game freakin' on guys.
Actually, "game freakin' on" is what Entertainment Weekly said about Survivor: Allstars. They were very excited about it, and it's huge in the US, but Simon Aimer prefers to read about it on Television Without Pity, which has great, if rather lengthy, blow-by-blows. Nic Igusa also recommended TWoP.
But before I get to more mail, what do we think of Christopher Eccleston being the new Dr Who? He didn't seem quite right at first, he's such a serious actor don't you know, but I'm warming to the idea and he was fantastic in Clocking Off. He's got the requisite weirdness and doesn't mind a bit a ass-baring (Elizabeth), but I hope the BBC doesn't try to turn him into too much of an action hero. Serious consideration should also be given to using the Blam Blam Blam version of the Dr Who theme. This interview in The Guardian shows him to be not as dour as we've been led to believe. Flesh and Blood has been screening on the Rialto channel, if you've got Sky.
Like Lindsay Vette, I can't stand reality shows. I mean, who cares?
Our preference is for just about anything but reality TV (and Coronation St). Apparently this doesn't sell enough Persil or carpet or whatever, so after about six episodes, it seems to be canned or reshuffled out of prime time to 11pm or later.
Examples: Sea Change, The Secret Life of Us, Keen Eddie.
Maybe we should just accept our lot, have the lobotomy and start watching Paradise Hotel and Survivor. As it is we seem to have a huge stock of recorded programmes that we now need to take a week's leave to watch.
Yes, the great god of ratings, Tangata Mita, rules over all the television in the land. Maori Television has a carving in the foyer. The latest series of The Secret Life of Us has been on at 11pm all along – I love it, such attractive characters, but it's a little bit like that song that goes "Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens …" I can tell you that only 13 eps of Keen Eddie were made, but I don't know if TV3 played all of them.
Quite a few of you complained about time shifts – we hate the networks playing fast and loose with series. Michael Wynd was also watching Joan of Arcadia, but it's been pulled in favour of the "old and very, very tired" Charmed. He also had things to say about Paul Homes interview with Kevin Barry: "Did Holmes feel any sense that it was unbalanced and frankly gave Barry a venue to make dubious allegations against his former client?" You may also see that Russell Brown has plenty to say about Holmes' interview with Nick Smith on Wednesday night.
Peter McLennan loves the bogan heaven of Monster Garage on Prime. Actually, so do my boy children. It's kinda nice that they didn't think it was that unusual that there were girls in the chop shop last week, wielding welding gear and getting tattoos. Kung Faux on C4 gets the nod from Peter as well.
Ian Parkes is really pissed off about Sunday Theatre, the new promos are "just bloody movies and other recycled tosh." Although I don't think you can blame Ralston, Ian, he's strictly news and current affairs.
I spent three years in Singapore -- the land of the three-letter acronym -- and they had the most godawful TV on the planet. At least I hope it was. What it lacked most was a healthy weekly injection of QBD -- quality British drama. It was one of the things I remembered most fondly about NZ. And now I come back, not only to find that Prime has sold out and now offers only fragments of its formerly stunning programming but to see that Sunday Theatre, the holy of holies is being sodded about with as well. It's an outrage, etc.
There has been some wailing and gnashing of teeth in Britain about the state of drama, it's not as abundant as it used to be and for a while there it all starred Michelle Collins. According to TVNZ, the new ST season also includes Prime Suspect VI, which got really good reviews in Britain, the Jimmy McGovern-penned Sunday, which is about Bloody Sunday and stars Dr Who, sorry, Christopher Eccleston, and something called Suspicion, which is … oh god, another murder mystery.
I did think Murphy's Law was really bloody good btw. The opening sequences were brilliantly edited.
Radiation also welcomes Mark Everton, an actual TV producer-type person, who sent his best wishes:
Careful, considered, informed and passionate debate is what we need -- from people who actually do care and have some positive thoughts to share.
Gemma Gracewood would like to see a twice-yearly critique of Shortland Street, which I'm sure is possible – you can write it, hon. Btw, could someone please slap Nelson? But maybe after he takes his shirt off again.
Lastly, Dave Chowdhury says his solution is to not watch TV. I'm sorry, Dave, but that just doesn't count.
Can we talk? | Mar 23, 2004 10:23
Unusually, there were a couple of responses to my last column in e.g. about stuff that's been annoying me on television lately. I say unusually because I didn't think anyone actually read those columns, and hardly anyone ever bothers to email me about them, unless it's to complain.
David Bott complained that Judy Bailey's voice has become nothing better than a screeching canary and also asked why TV One's weather presenters occasionally appear in different places around the country to present the weather, which is a very good point. The saddest time was when Kay had to do the weather from Matamata, the home of Hobbiton, when nearly all the other presenters were living it up on the red carpet interviewing Elijah and Liv for the world premiere of Return of the King in Wellywood. I'm sure she's too nice to say, but I know a few thoughts about where I'd have liked to insert Anduril into my news director would have been crossing my mind had I been her.
It's not just weather presenters either: Tony Veitch had to shout (at least he's good at that) the sports news over the racket being made by The Crusty Demons at Western Springs last weekend.
Chris Barry emailed to say he and his mates were also annoyed about TV3 screening season two of Angel, but did I know that they were now showing season four? I'd been told by the PR department that they were showing season two and wasn't bothering to watch, but TV3 switched a few episodes in to the new episodes. We all missed it, of course.
Happily, TV3 were good enough to send me tapes, but unhappily, didn't bother to reply to Chris's emails. Just as well we're fangeeks, and can swap tapes, then.
But I digress, which is possibly what this blog should be called, because the real reason for starting Radiation is to see if anyone's interested in a TV dialogue. Let's start the discussion. We don't have to have an inquiry or anything, just air our views. Most people have something to say about television, although if you write to say "It's all crap" that probably won't count. You have to say why.
Also welcome: your favourite TV sites, interesting stories you've found, anything fun or illuminating. Let's talk: the phone lines are open.
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